Confession.no idea how to help myself! ekkk HELP

so i try to be as strong as i can. im strong for everyone else but me..i put everyone before myself so that i do not have to face the fact that i am not taking the best care of myself. i rarely sleep, and dont eat as healthy as i should. i usually only sleep about 3 hours a night and that is once the sun is up, and that is not even every night its usually about every other. i know why i do not sleep, and it is because of fear. i have had type 1 diabetes for 13 almost 14 years. and i try to stay posotive about it, but in reality i am still affraid. i do not sleep because i used to have seizures due to low blood sugars. as a result i started to keep my blood sugars high so that i didnt fear going low in my sleep(which is tha only time it happened). now i am trying to get my blood sugars back on track and keep them that way, but i still get scared so i either let them stay high(and still barely sleep due to feeling sick), or keep them normal and dont sleep in fear of going low. i need help and i know it. as to what kind of help i have no clue. i need to take better care of myself, and i know it.i am just so scared of dying in my sleep and not at least getting to say goodbye to those i love. i am so scared that even when i am awake i am affraid to go low. it never used to scare me like this but for about the past year it a=has gotten so much worse. i hate it. i do not want to die!!! i know i wont if i take care of myself, but i am affrais so it makes it hard to take care of myself. please HELP me. i have no idea what to do. any ideas?

I'm probably not the best person to give advice but I have a sleeping issue to so I can relate. I think, and I know it's cliche but i think you should talk to a doctor. i know that the doctors have know idea how we feel unless they themselves have d but if you talk with a dietrician or someone who knows about hypoglycemia then they should have great advice. but staying high is never healthy, trust me I know. Oh drink orange juice before you sleep! OJ nearly puts me in a coma every time so yea. that's my advice sorry it sucks.

La Vonia J,

lol it dont suck. thank you for your input. and OJ deff sends my numberst hrough the sky. it just sucks that i cant sleep then when i try ta sleep i cant because my body is resisting it so bad, and i never can sit still for more than 3 minutes with out shaking out my body or getting up to do something(at night that is not all the time). i am so sick of it. i used to take such good care of myself i taught EMT's about type 1 diabetes and the insulin pump, and i went and talked to newly diagnosed type 1's growing up. i know how important it is to take care of myself, which is why im reachimg out for help now..i finally addmitted to myself that i am not taking care of myself prperly due to the sleeep thing. and i am so sorry you have type 1 also. but hey life always has its idiotic curve balls right? lol its first nature to us.

~jessa

i would work with a cde, and make every attempt to figure out why overnight bs would drop (exercise, food, insulin, basal rates, stress, basal insulin, whatever).  overnight bs control isn't impossible - neither is getting over fears.

Right, I don't sleep well either.  Just like you I am up around 2 am - 3 am and find it almost impossible to sleep as well.  Part of it is due to my fear of diabetes, but some of it is just the stress of life.  You know, you just can't turn the thinking off. 

The only thing I can say is getting your sugar up really high is obviously not the answer.  I have mentioned in other places testing a hour or so before bed, and then testing again may give you some chance of seeing what direction at least your sugar level is going (i.e., up or down). Try and go to sleep with a sugar level around the 120 - 150 range.  The bad part is if you wake late ( 8 am or later), you will most likely  have a high blood sugar due to dawn effect.  One thought I have also is I wonder if you might be a good candidate for a cgm.  Ask your doctor about it.