I just don\'t want to care

Hey guys, I’m Samantha. This October it’ll be three years that I’ve been diagnosed. I’m 18 now and I was a sophomore in high school when I found out I was diabetic. Which is a pretty ugly time to start dealing with something like that. I feel like I’ve gone through so much since that day… Like there’s so much I’ve experienced and so much I can talk about. Except, there’s nobody I can talk to about the illness on a personal level because nobody really can understand my life with diabetes. Everyone underestimates the illness and I hate it. I hate everything about it honestly. I’d love to be able to conversate with someone my age or close to my age about this. To see if I’m not the only one who goes through the depression, lack of motivation, anxiety, insecurities, eating disorders and everything else. If anyone can relate, I’d love to hear from you and share stories.

Hi @Saammko,

Sorry you are feeling down. We have definitely all been there before. While I never experienced going through High School with diabetes, I got diagnosed right after I turned 25. It was at my first job out of college and it was a completely horrible experience for me. At the time I didn’t have anyone to talk to about what I was feeling because there wasn’t much support online at that time. so be thankful for commuties like this where anyone is a finger type away! I bet you can talk to anyone on this site and they have gone through a similar experience to yours. Depression, Yep I suffer through it all of the time. Lack of motivation, yes. Anxiety on a daily basis, Eating Disorder, yep I am a survivor of that too.

You have to take one day at time and do the best you can and not beat yourself up. IT IS NORMAL to feel like any of those things at anytime. You are human.

Talking about it here will help. But, also finding people through your local JDRF chapter can as well. If you need help finding your local chapter check out http://jdrf.org/locations/ and type in your zip code.

Hang in there girl, you got this!

If you ever need a friend, I am here for you!

@gina

Hi im Jamie :slight_smile:
We probably have alot of similar stories! Im 17, female and was also diagnosed in my highschooling years, and it sucks! Although my friends try to help me and support me they just dont get it. I feel quite alone at my school so im quite willing to talk about it with someone else! Its so unfair to get it at this age when its one of the hardest times to manage it (hormones etc) we already have schooling/friendships stress to worry about haha. Just remember your not the only one and you dont have to feel alone. I can talk with you if you want :slight_smile:

Hi Saammko,

I was diagnosed when I was 11. My parents where very much in denial about the whole thing. Left me to figure it out for myself. I went through everything that you are going through. I still struggle with depression. Getting the motivation to test, exercise, and eat right which sucks. I struggle with weight gain which I hate. Your not alone. if you need someone to talk to I’m here too. I know it can be a lonely feeling.

Meghan

Hi Samantha - My daughter is a junior in high school with T1D, so through her eyes I can relate to what you might be going through. May I suggest that you check out www.studentswithdiabetes.com. Reach out to them for some support. They are all in your age group and doing some awesome things together. Nicole Johnson, their director, is a terrific woman and very supportive of JDRF as well. Let me know how it goes. Hang in there! Michael

Hey Samantha! I just wanted to let you know a few things! I am the third of three T1s in my family. I was diagnosed January 31 of 2013 giving me only a year and a half w T1. We have had 3 in 3 years. Hannah was the first to be diagnosed at 9 years old, Daniel was diagnosed at 12 years old, and I was diagnosed at 18 years old. I also am currently a sophomore in college. I am studying nursing and plan to specialize in pediatric Endocrinology, pretty much I want to work with newly diagnosed kids for the rest of my life! :slight_smile: I am sorry that you find yourself alone in your T1D! That is the worst thing that can happen! Support in this disease is everything! I have a blog, www.typeonetrio.com and also have Facebook! Please feel free to read through this and hopefully find encouragement. I know the feeling of being newly diagnosed and the hardships that we face! Please feel free to ask questions or concerns with T1D. I would love to help!

Your fellow Type One,

Caleb Hatchett

Hey Samantha,

I am very sorry to hear you feel alone in this disease. That is honestly, what I believe, one of the worst things that could happen! :frowning: I was diagnosed only a little under 2 years ago, January 31st, 2013. I am the third of three Type Ones in my family. We have had 3 in 3 years, its pretty rare but provides awesome opportunities to meet others through our story! :slight_smile:

I am currently in college- Nursing major with the goal of specializing in pediatric Endocrinology. Pretty much, I would love to work with newly diagnosed Type Ones for the rest of my life!

If you would like to read some of our story you can find it at www.typeonetrio.com! Feel free to read through this and hopefully you can find encouragement! I started this blog to help encourage other Type Ones, spread our story, and give honest insight into the life of the Type One Trio.

I also have FB for both T1Trio and my personal FB. Feel free to contact me and I would love to help you out in any way possible!!

You have totally got this!! Hang in there! :slight_smile:

Your fellow T1

Caleb Hatchett

Hey Samantha!

I know how you feel- I was diagnosed just a month before I started high school and I found it very difficult socially and emotionally. I would love to talk to you about feeling alone, depressed, and eating disorders as I have had experience with all three (and much more!). Feel free to message me I would love to talk!

Hey Samantha!
My name is Kelly and it seems that you and I have been through very similar situations throughout the years! I was diagnosed my 8th grade year (right before high school) which is also a very confusing time for any kid, let alone someone who is new to a disease as complicated as diabetes. That being said, I am now 19 and have made it through the tough years (socially and medically speaking) of high school.

What really stood out to me about your post is your comment about your friends underestimating the disease because I 100% understand where you’re coming from. Just the other day, in fact, I had one of my really good friends jokingly say “Ahh diabetes, I could handle that”. Let’s just say I had to muster up a lot of strength not to make a scene in front of the entire student union. And, yes, I know in some backwards way these comments are compliments to us (I can hear my parents in my head right now…), letting us know that we don’t let the disease drag us down or obsess over the exhausting disease that is diabetes, but, somedays it takes an extreme amount of effort to put a smile on your face and let those comments go.

Anyway, my point is that being diagnosed with diabetes at such a young age forces us to grow up much faster than most kids, which can be lonesome at times. I, however, want you to know there’s ALWAYS someone out there that can relate and I am free to lend an ear whenever you need!
Hang in there! Tomorrow will be better…
Kelly

@Saammko

Hey Samantha!

I was diagnosed 11 years ago at the age of 11. I was finishing Elementary School, transitioning to High School the next year. I know exactly where you’re coming from as I went through my entire high school career with it. I’m currently finishing University.

Just like yourself, I found that the most difficult part was being able to express what I was going through. It was always underestimated and still is! For some reason, some people think that they know it all. You’ll meet plenty of people like this in your lifetime. It’s a great opportunity to step up and teach them a thing or two.

A story I love to share was actually in one of my University classes, when Diabetes came up and someone brought up the fact that Diabetes is not an emotional disease. How wrong that individual was. I had a field day arguing that. People just don’t understand what it’s like to have a full-time 24/7 job with no vacations. That’s what Diabetes is.

Again, you’re not alone. Most of us go through the exact same emotions that you currently experience. Lack of motivation was a big problem for me. Even when I found the motivation, I never put the work in and that made me extremely frustrated.

As a high schooler I did not have the desire to meet people like I do today who share the same experiences with Diabetes. Now I volunteer hours with different organizations devoted to advocacy of the disease/support networks. I’ve met so many incredible people from all different spectrum.

The good news is that there are resources out there for people to talk to if you’re ever feeling down. Especially being in the internet-age, this site is an amazing place to start!

Better days are ahead as you continue to grow. We’re all here to help!

In the meantime, just like everyone else here, you’re very welcome to message myself and we can chat/share other stories.

Hey Samantha -
Completely understand. Sometimes teachers don’t get it. We have an invisible disease. I never wanted a 504 Plan till this week. I feel better about T1D meeting young kids and letting them know they aren’t alone. Sometimes just showing them they aren’t alone makes me feel I am not alone. I too have decided to be a Pediatric Nurse. We don’t get a break. I went base camping at Mt. Washington last fall and it was 10 degrees. I had a temp failure on my pump and put it in my bra with hand warmers. It’s not fun. It is part of me so I have to embrace it and not ignore it for my health.
Caroline