My son is burnt out at age 15. i can't help my best friend!

he has stated many times that he is done being diabetic. he easily forgets to monitor his sugar. he chooses what numbers to enter in his pump but will guess the correction .. we have spells of this throughout the year then everything will run smooth. as a dad it is killing me to watch my best friend risk his health and i can't stop him without 24/7 monitoring. my wife is so sad because she feels it to be her responsibility and she is failing her son. he is the love of our life and my best friend

Your son's behavior is pretty normal for a diabetic teen.  Frankly if you get through these years without him having to be hospitalized, that's considered successful diabetes management for a teen!

The only real solution is for him to grow up, but that's going to take time.  This article will help give you some perspective.

Ask him if there's anything you can do to help, including backing off.  Micromanaging or guilt tripping won't work.  It is okay to create rules for his safety, like that he's not allowed to practice driving unless his blood sugar is within 80-250 (or some other reasonable range) or that he has to carry glucose tablets or sugar on him at all times for unexpected lows.    

The risky behavior of a diabetic teen can have tragic consequences, but it doesn't have to.  Kind of like how most teens drive badly and fast, but most of us live to tell the tale.  I has TERRIBLE control from age 15-25.  My A1c was consistently high and I skipped shots or gave random amounts of insulin.  I was hospitalized twice in one week of college... once for an extreme high and once for an extreme low.  When I was 25 I realized it was a waste of my time and that the crazy blood sugars made me feel terrible.  Now I'm a middle aged mom with a son of my own.  No diabetes complications after 34 years with type 1.  My control isn't perfect (6.5 A1c) but I rarely have lows and haven't had a crazy diabetes episode in a decade.  

My prayer is that your son is smarter than I was and won't be so reckless.  But he'll have to reach that point in his own time.  Take care and don't lose hope.   -Jenna

My son is also 15 and has T1 for 15 mo and has has very difficult time. I feel that he should test more often and be stricter about his insulin. I have also learned that micro managing has got me know where. Thru lots of counseling and being supportive of him things have gotten much better. We to have good days and bad days. I try very hard to not be defensive and to not ask to many questions and I try to let him come to me with concerns. I do make him check before he drives everytime so hopefully when he is on his own he will do it himself. I check his meter when it is laying around the house just for some reassurance. And I really think that being his support system is what is best. My son is very angry about the disease bit I try to help learn that he is on control of this disease instead of vice-versatile. Good luck and I hope things get better for you.

I seem to sweat the daily doses of insulin and carb counting for my teenage son. It was easier when he was younger. Now he has more control and like all teenagers do not think with logic.  Why do I have to feel so hurt when he is out of control? Why does he eat all carbs and not enough vegetables to help fill him up.  I understand he is a growing boy but cmon.  This is so difficult as a parent to have to experience I cant even imagine how my son feels when I loose control cause his blood sugar is high and his A1C's continue to go up....Breath...

Maybe your son needs a break once in a while. Can he give up responsability for his type 1 one day per week and have a parent take over that day?

Being a parent is terrifying. I can't believe all the stuff we go through. Type 1 is sometimes the least of our problems.

I agree with Terry. My daughter is nearly 13, and our philosophy has always been to give her as much responsibility as she can handle, and keep as much as she wants us to. She manages her diabetes during the day when she’s at school and such, but gives it back to me in the evenings. I really think this helps keep her from burnout. Will your son let you help him? Even if you just helped him for dinner, that would give you a chance to confirm he gets any necessary correction dose not too long before bed.

Also, we’ve talked to Sarah a lot about being responsible and how it’s important that she manages her diabetes so that she can keep up with all her activities. I’m not saying to take everything away, but diabetes management is really important. Sarah has activities where I can’t always be there to help, so I’ve made it pretty clear that she needs to continually show me that she can make responsible decisions, or I may decide she needs either more supervision or to choose a different activity.