My Thoughts In the Beginning

I wrote this a while ago... It's kinda sad, but it's still really good, I think.

 

Sometimes I don't want to wake up.

Becuase the worst part of my everyday tells me, "Good morning."

Depressing, it carries on through the day and it is still at my side as the day fades again. 

But while I sleep, I don't worry. It doesn't exist for a few hours. 

Sleep is my reprieve. And I smile.

"It's all right. It'll get better." Yes, yes. I know. 

I smile all day. 

No one sees my thoughts. They don't see my pain.

But it no longer registers as pain... more grief.

It's only the beginning. 

It will become easier.

Someday.

Which day?

Why do I have to worry.?

Of all the times, why now?

I sleep and do not think of anything, or anyone, or worry.

Content with restful blackness, or even a dream.

But when you dream everyday, a nightmare is bound to come.

Hi Sofia,

You're poem really caught my attention and touched my heart not only because it is so sensitively written, but also because it expresses so well the feelings all of us Type 1's often have.

I am 57 years old and have had Type 1 diabetes for almost 40 of those years.  I would like you to know what I was thinking about just today as I road as the  passenger on a friend's motorcycle at 65+ miles per hour through the beautiful upstate New York countryside in this absolutely glorious 70+ degree weather.  (It was the FIRST time I had ever been on a motorcycle!)

I thought about how much I have enjoyed my life and was still enjoying it.  I thought about how, despite my occasional struggles with my Type 1, I wouldn't trade my life for any other life in the world.  I thought abo9ut how full with adventures, friendships, discovery growth achievement and love thsse past 40 years have been.

Sofia..., I believe you too will have a wonderful life full of all the wonders life has to offer.  It will get easier, and perhaps during your lifetime, we will even have a cure.  Sleep tight... and dream pleasant dreams tonight!

 

Paul