Hi , my name is Jackie and I could really use some support right now. Here is a little background, I was mis diagnosed with type 2 when I was 24. As my honeymoon phase dwindled, my doctor realized I was a type 1. This revelation occurred a couple months before my wedding. I went to a new, highly recommend endo who put me on insulin right away (lantus and novolog on a sliding scale, I still don't know how to count carbs!!) I previously was on meteformin and byetta and my sugars were not that out of control. To make a long story short, I gained almost 20 pounds in the two weeks since I started insulin. This sent me into a total panic. I was already working harder than usual to look fabulous for my wedding day so this was a huge setback! not to mention that I purchased a very expensive gown that I was not going be able to fit into! I informed my endo and he started me on symlin and sent me to a nutritionist. I started at 1100 calorie diet and was doing cardio for a minimum of an hour every day! Still no results. Here is the part that I am embarrassed to admit....in a desperate plea to get rid of the extra weight, I stopped taking my lantus and novolog! I used the maximum amount of symlin every time I ate and stopped testing! (wow I have never told anyone this) I very rarely had any lows and I am scared to think how high my sugars reached! Yes, I did lose the weight but was still very angry about my diabetes since I was at my break even weight rather than the 10 pounds less I hoped to be at my wedding. I know it must seem like I am very vain and/or have an eating disorder. Truthfully, I have a pretty good body image and have always been very confident. I have never taken extreme actions to lose weight in the past. I think the timing of the new diagnosis and insulin treatment brought out all my anger about being diabetic. When I was first diagnosed, I was a model diabetic, did everything I was supposed to and MORE.
The wedding has passed and it was everything I dreamed of. However, I just can't seem to get my diabetes under control. My sugars are constantly VERY high, but I am so scared to take insulin and gain weight! I know that my health is suffering, but I can't seem to get out of my own way!
I really want to get my diabetes back on track and hope to start a family. We have met with our high risk doctor and she informed us how important super tight sugar control is for at least three months before we even try. Being a mother is the most important thing in the world to me, yet even that can't get me to get my diabetes in check! Help! has anyone else felt this way? any advice? thanks for letting me share!