I'm sorry you're having a hard time with your son's high numbers. The pre-teen/teen years are a very trying time for diabetes management.
There's one huge issue that pops up for every child as he reaches
adolescence and that's CONTROL. Having diabetes complicates these
feelings even more.
I can't speak in absolute terms about what works and what doesn't, but I'll try to share with you what has worked for us...
Our 13 year old is a willful child and has had T1 diabetes for over 12 years. One thing we've done is to try to create an environment where Cassie feels like cheating isn't a big deal. Here's how that works: She can eat anything she wants (even if she's high) - AS LONG AS SHE TREATS IT WITH INSULIN.
Is this always a good thing? Probably not. And certainly not for everyone.
But we also let her know that HER decisions have consequences, and that SHE has the ultimate power to affect them.
We also try to tell her what the smart choice should be, and to try to:
1.) Abstain from a high carb treat if she's already high, and opt for a low carb alternative.
2.) Give herself insulin. Wait until she gets down a little, THEN have the treat.
3.) Have the treat, but be sure to give plenty of insulin (preferably beforehand).
Does your son have these choices and feel like none of them is bad or good- just different options?
We as parents can't do it for our daughter all the time. It's impossible to be with her at every waking moment. We can only offer guidance that she can take with her. In the end, SHE has to do it. It's a weighty responsibility for a youngster, and I wish we could shield her from it. But I consider our job as parents will be a success if she can manage to take care of herself (and her diabetes) without feeling the need to lean on us.
Good luck Tiffany. I know one thing- your son is very fortunate to have a mom who cares and is smart enough to try to find answers for him. Hang in there. You guys can tackle this together.