Newly diagnosed 12 yr old daughter

Hi, my name is Amy and my daughter, Maia was diagnosed on 2/25/15. The last almost 2 weeks have been overwhelming, shocking and filled with fear. She spent 4 days in a pediatric hospital and we tried to learn everything we could. I have nightmares that something will happen to her, she is an emotional roller coaster and I just wish it were me. She is my middle child and I have a 15 yr old daughter and 6 year old son, and no time for anyone/anything. Looking to meet other parents, thanks!


Hi Amy :slight_smile:
I can just imagine how u r feeling. It is just soooo overwhelming in the beginning. Its all too much to learn before you have even got over the shock of diagnosis.
My son was diagnosed Sept '12 , went into a diabetic coma and ambulanced to hospital. It was just awful and I still remember it all too clearly.
Two and a half years on things are very different. Life is normal again and diabetes just fits in. Im not suggesting it doesn’t have its problems, infact the last 3 or so months have been very challenging as my son is now 15 and a typical teenage boy interested in all the things 15 year old boys r interested in, rather than looking after his health and diet.
Stay positive which is difficult at your stage, but my advice would be to acknowledge all your feelings infront of your child too which will allow your child too adwell. How u r feeling right now is how u r feeling and its ok to cry and feel devastated in my opinion. Obviously as a parent we need to get a grip and be strong thus teaching our child to do the same but take your time , its really really early stages for u.
Hope I have helped in some way. Happy to chat more,
Best wishes :slight_smile:

Hi Amy,

Our daughter is now 12 and was diagnosed at age 4. Like you, we spent 4 days in the hospital learning what we needed to do to manage this disease. While it certainly doesn’t seem like it now, your daughter and your family will return to a “new” normalcy. It takes some time, and going through some ups and downs, but it will happen. We found that attending a local support group was a great way to meet other parentsand kids going through the same thing. Your local chapter of JDRF likely plans events that brings kids and family’s together as well. I believe this site or others like it also put kids in touch with each other to discuss the challenges they face. You are not alone as evidenced by the many posts on this site. Feel free to ask questions or just vent, we’ve all been there.


Thank you so much! I am such a type A person, black and white all that exists for me so knowing every second is different is really hard. I know it’s way to early to think I got this in control, in fact it’s likely to go up and down all the time. I feel so much guilt I didn’t take her to a doctor sooner, she had mood swings, headaches and belly aches but honestly it mimicked exactly what an almost 13 year old girl goes through! It wasn’t till she started drinking everything in sight and complaining of severe thirst did I suspect. I still thought I was being dramatic and that it was nothing. I appreciate you taking the time to post, I know we need to relax but it’s just consuming my everything thought. It’s difficult for her to go to school, me to work, or do anything but think Diabetes.

Hi Amy,
My son was diagnosed at age 12 and we also spent 3 days in a children’s hospital. It was scary and overwhelming but now that he is 14 it has become a way of life. You will get through it, it has never been easy, but this is something he now takes charge of, he is extremely independent and realizes how important it is to take care of himself. My advice is to make her as independent as you can, be there for her to help her and advise her, but give her the independence she needs to conquer this disease. You can do this and so can she…hang in there.

Hi Amy,
Welcome to Type1Nation! We are here to listen, support, and hold your hand through this. The first thing to know is that everything you are feeling is OK. You have the right to your feelings. My 13 yr old daughter was diagnosed in Oct of 2014. I have since learned not only the technical stuff, but that expressing our feelings is so important. Your daughter needs to know that you are with her in this. We can not take it over from our kids. She needs to know how you are feeling just as you need to know how she is feeling. This is a lifestyle change that affects the whole family. There is a grief process involved. Your feelings I guilt are understandable but unwarranted. You simply did not know. Things are gonna be crazy for a while. I also learned that the diagnosis does not mean that she can’t do the things she wants to do. She just has another layer added on top. Feel free to vent here. We all do. Take care of yourself.

Hello Amy, sorry to hear abt your daughter, but you should know that we are all here to listen. No one else will understand what you are going through!!! All of your feelings are valid!!!

My dghtr was diagnosed 6.5 months ago and let me tell you we are still struggling. She just went through her honeymoon stage and we feel like it was day one. Community support has been our savior. We started that a month ago and it has helped. We are also starting to go out a little more and have met great people. Reach out to your community and try to attend as many community events. Good luck.

Hi Amy
I just wanted to be one of the many who tell you that you are not alone.
My son was diagnosed 3 years ago at age 11. I was really overwhelmed at first. It took a while, but I found some other parents through the grapevine. We bonded and as soon as we got our kids together… So did they! We have had some social evenings and have invited some adults with T1D to talk us through it. We contacted the local JDRF chapter, now my son is a youth ambassador and he gives some public appearences to explain T1D to others. At diagnosis a very experienced dad told me, that I could handle this ( I thought he had seriously overestimated me), I am still here handling it. So I can tell you, “You can handle this”. It does take time and it is frightening and confusing - you are not alone!

Hi Amy,
This is so familiar to me. My middle daughter was diagnosed at age 11 and also a middle child with an older sister and younger brother. In a few weeks you will begin to have a few “new” normal days. Something that we have always made clear is that she is a teenager first and a diabetic 2nd. We always put diabetes into her life. With her being a female you may also find that your daughter’s #'s may increase as her “cycle” :slight_smile: approaches. We have made a few adjustments for my daughter with this. Has the endocrinologist talked about the use of an insulin pump? This was a life changing tool to allow more of a “normal” life but sometimes the drs. want to wait a few months after diagnosis. Something to look into so when the time comes you will be prepared to make decisions. We also involved the other siblings with info. My thought for you is to take time every day and do something for yourself! (exercise, walk, scrapbook, knit etc…) It will help you with the stress and coping of the new way of life. Please let me know if I can help with any tips. We as Moms need to support and share ideas outside of the Type 1 textbook!

Hi Amy,
I can just how overwhelmed you must be, it is a big responsibility for you - but you will survive and so will your daughter. Your life will be filled with things like diet, testing, shots and WORRY. If you can, relax a little and everything will fall into place; yes, I said relax but please stay aware.

you had so much information “thrown” [I’m using that term loosely] during the four days in the hospital and I can understand your anxiety - 58 years ago I spent two weeks in hospital to get myself balanced - blood sugar tests then took about 8 hours and still had much to learn. you are doing what is right, asking questions, reading and studying this scary thing called diabetes. Certainly it will have a big impact on her life and on you and your family but she can live with it, and do just about anything she wants to do - encourage her, yes at 12, to take charge and discourage her from thinking that T1D will rule her life. Yes, let her be a “normal” kid.

And don’t forget that her little brother and big sister still need you as their mom. Be a family.

Welcome Amy,
You are not alone. My ten-year-old son was diagnosed January 15, 2015 and I have a 15 year old son too. The first few weeks are hectic and stressful but be flexible and find your groove. That flexibility will pay off when the honeymoon hits. For us it is paying off with arrival of warmer weather. He is a lot more active now that he can be outside running around so we are in a state of battling lows. He is catching those lows and is happy to be able to eat without a shot since he is covering activity.

Find that groove and involve the family and you will be just fine.

For your other children; has any told you about TrialNet where your other children can also be screened for antibodies? It is an easy process and can help prevent this for their children/our grandchildren.

Hi Amy - Nothing new to add, just writing to say I understand what you are feeling … my son (oldest of 3) was diagnosed December 27, 2014. Those first 2 weeks were the hardest. We still have moments (especially since soccer season is on us - getting a handle on how to keep his numbers up) - but I’m getting more sleep and (I think) in a better place. I’m just getting on these boards to connect with people who really understand, I’m hoping this is going to help, too.

Hi Amy, my daughter Amberlea (10) was diagnosed in November of last year. We have went through so many ups and downs. Just today Amberlea told me she just could not do this anymore. My heart breaks for all of the families struggling with this disease on a daily basis. I am new to the support groups, and hopefully I can connect with other parents facing similiar situations.

Well Amy, I agree with everything that’s been said thus far. When my son (now 10) was diagnosed 7 years ago at the age of 3, if it didn’t have a carb count on it, he didn’t get to eat - that simple. You will find with time that it all becomes second nature. The other day, he forgot his lunch. I work at the school & we were able to get one of the school lunches for him. No carb counts - yay! I looked at the lunch, he told me what he was going to eat, I did my best estimating and after school his BG was 153! I think I did a pretty good job. One thing I would highly recommend is that you get a book called How to Think Like a Pancreas. It was a blessing to me to discover that this disease has a mind of it’s own sometimes and even when you do everything right, it still doesn’t work. It was nice to have that validation in writing. Hang tough and keep reaching out. We all need a place to “vent” and you’ve found it here!