Well after too much diet Mountain Dew and not sleeping, I was just thinking. Yea, I know that can cause trouble. LOL
Here's my rant I guess. Normal that's what they told me I could live when I was dx'ed. I am telling the world right now BULL POOP!!!!!! I was dx'ed at age 52 and I remember normal. Normal Isn't getting up in the morning and right after the bathroom the next thing I do is my diabetes routine. I bet you know what I am talking about. First the lancing of the finger, too see how I am doing, then there's the meds. I take aspirin, a statin for cholesterol, some other thing for blood pressure(which I don't have) and something to help quiet smoking. Then after all that comes my favorite part, playing dart board with my body.
So somebody tell me HOW that's fricking normal!!! I go to the store and get food, now I look at all the labels and think is this worth injecting and eating. Now I choose salad instead of fries, veges instead of rice. I never did these thing before dx'ed. I just ate food for taste, so again I ask, How is this normal???? Normal is getting hungry and eating a whole bag of corn chips and bean dip, a whole pint of Ben and Jerry's (Cherry Garcia, etc...) or how about a whole bag of Oreo's with two huge glasses of milk, that's normal, not six cookies, a small glass of milk and six units of insulin stabbed into my stomach.
I guess it gets to me sometimes. Now diabetes affects every part of my life now, I can't eat, sleep, drive and whatever without this major pain in the butt!!!! Just writing this makes me cry, grieving over my past life!!!
It's like that story of the King with the sword hanging from a silk thread over his head. Everyday for the rest of my life I know I would be dead if not for insulin, that's my sword and it's just getting to me.
I shout to the world. THIS IS NOT NORMAL!!!!!!! Don't tell me it is!!!!! I think I need some sleep, Oh, how do I know it's sleep and not something else, because I am Diabetic Type 1 and my blood sugar was 106. That's normal. ROFLMAO