You are not a statistic. You are a person who has your own unique experience with diabetes and will have a unique pregnancy. The reality is that moms with diabetes have been having healthy pregnancies for a long time, with and without textbook A1cs. Try not to stress. I think the most important thing a woman can do to get pregnant and have a healthy pregnancy is to be happy and content with life.
Below is a giant list of things that helped me have a healthy pregnancy, but it's purely informational, not a list of things you must do or else you're a terrible mother. Sometimes doctors forget that we're real people, not robots that live to fill out our glucose log books and check our feet daily. =) I am a fairly relaxed diabetic and only do the diabetes management things that are worth the trouble to me. When I was pregnant, I found books like "What to Expect When You're Expecting" way to demanding and stressful. So I did the basics (keep blood sugars as normal as possible, eat some vegetables, enjoy my pregnancy) and everything was just fine.
Because of my diabetes I didn't think I should have kids. Thankfully we had an "unexpected blessing" at age 32 with an A1c just below 7. Having a baby on board was the biggest motivator... my A1c quickly dropped to a 5.1 and stayed there for the duration of my pregnancy. My son was born healthy and had a normal blood sugar.
I wish I had known earlier how possible it is to have a healthy pregnancy with diabetes. I would have had 5 kids!
It takes extra work but it doesn't feel like a burden when you're doing it for your child. The things that helped me:
* A pump. Think it's smart that you're giving it another try since pumps dose insulin so much more accurately and give 24/7 coverage.
* Test blood sugar and take correction doses often. Highs happen but you can minimize their impact. During pregnancy I also would bolus, eat, then test and give a correction bolus an hour later. It pretty much eliminated big post meal spikes.
* Target blood sugar of 80 with frequent testing to make sure I didn't have lows. Lows can damage your baby's neurological development. My usualy target is 100, but my goal in pregnancy was to have non-diabetic blood sugar levels as much as possible.
* Refresh on carb counting. When pregnant I ate whatever I wanted (until 3rd trimester when I would avoid high fat or high carb meals at dinner because delayed stomach emptying caused middle of the night highs), but I looked up carbs and bolused accurately for what I ate. If you have a smart phone the Calorie King or LoseIt! apps are great. The Calorie King book is good if you don't have a smart phone.
* Exercise helped with insulin resistance and helped me feel so much better. In first trimester I was too tired to exercise, but by 2nd I signed up for an expectant moms exercise class at the hospital and did water aerobics and yoga. It felt great and was wonderful to meet other moms.
After pregnancy my A1c went back to their normal 6.5 - 6.9 levels and I can't imagine having a 5.1. But when you have a baby affected by your choices, it's easy to be in tighter control. As a mom you'll do all sorts of things you never knew you were capable of.