Really starting to struggle

Ok so I've been dx'd for 3 weeks now & I'm really starting to struggle with it. I am so positive on the outside but I have all these fears & worries I keep on the inside. I'm sure this is normal but still I hate admitting it even to yall. :( I'm so worried about gaining weight! I hate it. & I hate that people keep telling me "Maybe if you lose some more weight you'll be able to get off your insulin." I've heard that twice today! It's not like I'm already body conscience enough but I'm not even that type! I am considered "overweight" but I only have 10 more lbs to lose & then I'll be in the "normal" range. I'm 5'8" & 170ish. This is the lowest I've been in forever. I should feel good about myself but I don't. I want to be "diabulimic" but yet I am scared of the negative effects it could have. I'm just so frustrated. :/


Hi Stephanie -

Loosing weight as a diabetic can be troubling but it can be done !! When I was your age, I was 183lbs at 5'9".  It took me almost a year and some weeks were good and some were bad but I lost about 28 lbs.  In the past 6 months, I have gained about 10 lbs.  I'm not happy about it, but its not the end of the world. I gained weight b/c I stopped counting my carbs correctly and started to eat things I shouldn't of.  When I finally admitted it to myself, I decided that I need to get back on track.  Although my weight has fluctuated, its all a part of life.  I went through a phase where I guess I could call myself 'diabulimic' and lost a ton of weight but couldn't enjoy what I thought it would bring me b/c I constantly felt TERRIBLE.  Now that I'm a little bit older (30), I've realized that I could of done a lot of damage to my body.  There are bigger and better things in life to look forward to than being skinny.  My focus now is to look to the future and get myself as healthy as I can b/c my boyfriend and I are talking about a future and starting a family.

My best advise is aim high for the future and think about the things you want to do, travel, family, etc and everytime you think you want to be 'diabulimic' ...think about how the goals you have set for youself could be even harder to achieve!!

Good luck !!  And're not alone!

People are stupid.  It is something you have to get used to.  My daughter was a cute pudgy baby and my mother's overweight neighbor said "wow, she really has a lot of baby fat!"  I looked at him and said, "thanks for noticing, you have a lot of adult fat"  I am trying to think of something to say back to the idiots that suggest if you lose 10lbs you will not need insulin.  How bout, "wow, maybe if you had a brain you would know that losing weight is not going to fix my  immune system"

Also, diabulimic is not the way to go because you will be so sick no one will notice that you are thin and fabulous. I am so sorry you are having a hard time right now.  Don't give up.  I am frusterated every day.  it is part of the daily lif of T1.  It's an hourly battle.  I am not trying to be negative, I am just honest.  Count your carbs, eat smaller portions, high protein.  And be patient. :)

I was dxd when I was 6, 18 years ago. I don't know if I gained a lot of weight, since not only was I growing due to my age, but I lost a ton of weight before I was diagnosed. I was never what I would consider skinny in high school, but my weight was pretty stable. After my first year of college, I got more serious about exercising and eating better. I got a pump in 7th grade, which made it easier to eat things I shouldn't, cuz I could just crank up the insulin. I have actually lost about 12 lbs over the last year and a half. Most of this is probably due to increased exercise. I was moderately active in high school, but in college I had a nice gym 2 minutes away, so I really started trying harder and I have worked hard to maintain it.

Some people will gain weight, but certainly not everyone, especially if you try to stay on top of it. You are in a super vulnerable spot right now, this process is so new and the huge amount of information you are processing is overwhelming and scary - all the health problems and "recommended" diets that seem impossible to actually follow... And to complicate stuff further, the rest of your body works just fine, which means all the stress you are under could trigger weight gain as well. For me, high amounts of stress seriously messes with my blood sugar.

As for not taking insulin, as others mentioned, you feel terrible! When I am high, I can't think well, my mind is foggy, I am exhausted and kinda nauseous, my ability to focus is greatly restricted. I can't afford to walk around in haze like that, my job is too important and I would make tons of dumb mistakes or miss deadlines because I couldn't get my brain to work.

Try to focus on one day and one thing at a time. Everybody has bad days, but it will get easier! Everybody responds to things differently, so one person's experience may be very different from yours. You can totally do this!!

People are absolutely DUMB when it comes to type 1 diabetes. I was diagnosed at 18 yrs old. I was 5'5" and weighed 82 lbs. I was seriously underweight. I was so skinny! And I still had people try to give me their input about "You just need to exercise more." "You must just eat too much sugar or drink to much soda." Everyone had some stupid, rude comment to say to me. People acted like I inflicted this upon myself because I was so lazy and unhealthy. Yeah right. It has been almost 2 yrs since I was diagnosed and I still get these comments ALL THE TIME. It used to make me so angry. It was very insulting. But I have come to realize that most people just don't know anything about type 1 diabetes. The only people who really know about it are people who are actually effected by it. Most people just think it's caused from being lazy or fat. That's not the case. Don't be hard on yourself. Having diabetes is not your fault! It happens to many people, even infants and toddlers. Today I am 20 and I weigh about 97-98 lbs. So I have gained about 15 or so lbs. I have to admit it was hard on me. I have a lot of people comment on my weight gain. And it's hard when I'm trying to fit into my old pants that I can't hardly button anymore. But it is NOT worth it to be "diabulimic". I know there are women (and maybe men too) who manipulate their insulin dosage so their BG levels are just high enough to loose weight. Short term, you might like it. But not at all worth it long term. Having your numbers run even just a little high long term will hurt you in the end. I already have nerve damage in one of my eyes and I haven't even had diabetes for 2 yrs! Diabetes is not only a physical disease, it's also very emotional. It really takes a toll on you. Sometimes you just feel like giving up. You will have to fight and stay strong to remain healthy. It's not easy and it does take a lot of effort. But it's all worth it to be healthy! I know a T1 man who is in his 70's and wears an insulin pump. He works very hard to maintain good health. He was diagnosed back in the 50's and to this day is still active and well! It's very inspirational to me to know that if you work hard enough, diabetes will not stop you from anything.

Hi my name is tabitha but you can call me tabby! I am really sorry to hear that! I was diagnosed in october with type one! I am 5'8 myself and I weigh around 170! It really is complicated... I am very precausious about my weight! Ya know sometimes I even took it to the limit that I was gonna starve myself... I know its wrong and I don't.. Its just it is really difficult.. and i recently found this site! Know one really knows what we do go through! But I am gonna tell you this.. 170 is not bad especially you being this tall we are actually the same weight and height pretty much! Don't let anyone get you down! If you would like to talk more we definitely can! Because I am struggling with the same things! :)

First off, who cares what other people say? I mean it's cool to hear peoples opinions but they are just that Opinions. They don't know you (personally and by EVERY detail) Staying positive is always hard. BUT it's how you deal with things and what you make of what has happened that makes you who you are. Everyone has frailty. But like i said it's how you over come that and grow. Become stronger.

I just got my medical alert tattoo and 6 people so far have told me why in the heck did i do something stupid like that? And then i say because i want it to be known that i am diabetic (then blabber on) It is literally how you deal with your life (being diabetic) and at the same time dealing with people and your own personal stresses. AND who cares about how much you weight? THOSE ARE NUMBERS. They do not make you, YOU. Never be scared of gaining weight. If you feel healthy then that is all that matters. 

Don't stress out about things. They will run their course and i know that you could easily over-come em. Keep your chin up and keep moving forward.


Hi there Stephanie,

Sweetie, first off tell those idiots that you don't have the "old, fat person kind of diabetes"!!! (You have to "dumb it down" for some people) hehehe.   You have type ONE!  Those people are probably trying to be sensitive, but truthfully they're just ignorant and think that all diabetics are overweight because the only diabetics they ever knew was their grandparents!! 

Honey, I'll be 35 this summer.  I was diagnosed with type ONE (JUVENILE) diabetes waaaay back in 1980 (when I was 4 yrs old).  I've been on an insulin pump since then.

You need to be very careful when trying to lose weight though; your blood sugars can bottom out.  Talk w/ your endocrinologist and set up a meeting with the dietician, and the dietician should be able to give you a meal plan to help you lose a few pounds, if that's what you want to do.  Right now, I'm doing a diet, which I SHOWED TO MY DR PRIOR TO STARTING IT, and I'm down 16 pounds in 3 weeks.  And, girl, that's a LOT when you're over 30!  haha

Good luck sweetie.  Try not to feel overwhelmed.  There are times when my sugars go up and down, for no apparent reason, that I get sad.  It's okay and normal to feel sad sometimes.  We're human!! 

You hold your head up high and priss your butt off.  Don't let those people get you down.  :D  We all got your back here!!



Your weight is fine, and tell people that you really don't want to here their opinions unless they have the medical degree to go with it.  Look into counseling, if you are newly diagnosed this is the time you need the most help so you can make wise decisions and deal with the stress and anxiety that you are finding yourself under.  Most people who like to throw out their own opinions about diabetes but are not diabetics themselves, or have a diabetic child (they are probably the most knowledgeable) are still spreading the rumors they neard from the stone ages.

Jared- I was just reading through the thread and saw your post....It was very encouraging to me and I just wanted to personally thank you for your wise words!