Hi everyone, my daughter was just diagnosed in June, she is 2. She seems to be doing amazing, she handles the shots and pokes like no big deal. Most days I can have the same outlook. But other days, like today, I feel like I’m falling apart, and I’m overwhelmed. Does anyone else feel this?!
Hi, Erin @EcDrapeau,
I’m sorry you haven’t received a response already. Feeling like you are “falling apart” and feeling “overwhelmed” is a common occurrence for parents of young children who have T1D. I wish it was easier.
Here are some things to do. Click on the “Resources” link at the top of the page and scroll down to the “Online Diabetes Support Team” section and click on the button. Ask the person who responds to give you some numbers to call (e.g., the nearest JDRF Chapter) so you can get some names of people to talk to about how you feel. They will have resources you can use to feel better-supported by the T1 diabetes community.
Talk to your daughter’s pediatrician and ask for a referral to a Diabetes Educator. The Diabetes Educator will know what you are feeling and can help you get the support you need to feel more confident that you can handle this.
Search this forum for posts from others who are in your situation. Enter the term “parent” in the search box and scroll through the results. You’ll see posts that are similar to the challenges you face.
Continue to stay abreast of what’s happening on this forum. From time-to-time you’ll see posts from others where you can respond and be part of the discussion.
Get involved with your nearest JDRF Chapter. There you can network with other parents of small children and feel more comfortable with how things are going.
I hope your husband is pitching in and sharing the burden with you. Raising a small child who has T1D is really, really intimidating. When you have an active partner helping you it makes it easier.
I have now had T1 for more than 60 years; I was diagnosed at age 5. I continue to be very active in community life and in the lives of our children and grandchildren. It can be done! Is it easy? No! But with a little support from people who have been there you can do this!
Good luck to you!
@EcDrapeau hi Erin,
@BillHavins gave some great suggestions as to what you can do, I just want to acknowledge that type 1 is relentless, exhausting, and unpleasant.
make sure to take care of yourself. Caregivers in general are under a lot of stress. Caregivers that are also the parents have this stress and add anxiety (something will happen to my baby) and anger (why can’t I help my baby) and grief (what could I have done differently so this would not be the outcome) and these things can deplete you without you having to go, and check, and do, and drive, and launder, and feed, and shop…
if at all possible, enlist the help and support of everyone around you. you need a full team. and don’t forget to include a moral support system as well. Please be careful with your self-esteem, there is nothing you did or didn’t do that caused this.
You can do it. it may seem impossible today if you decide to look forward 2,5,10,16 years but don’t do that… instead take things one day at a time. There are people here who have had these difficulties, and have figured it out, and you certainly can too. Your daughter needs a fearless and supportive leader right now, and already believes you are a superhero… lets be blessed with the strength to be the hero they already believe we are…
I am so sorry you are having a tough time. Yes, other people do feel like this, and sometimes we just have to be kind to ourselves. My daughter is quite a bit older than yours (she is 15 and was diagnosed almost 4 years ago…) so from my experience things do get a little more familiar. But bad days are bad days - I have written a list for myself of what to do on the overwhelming days, and it includes phoning a friend, writing, looking at happy photos and taking a long bath. (None of which might appeal to you - but I am sure you could make your own nurture list!!). Anyway, I am thinking of you, and hope tomorrow is better.
You are not alone, yes there are others such as myself who sometimes feel like this. I am learning that we have to take self care seriously, we have to take care of us in order to be able to take care for our children. Be easy on yourself, it is a learning process for everyone involved and I am sure you are doing your best and will continue to get better! Sad days will come but what you do with those sad days is up to us, cheer up, I am sure in her eyes you are the best caregiver <3
Thank you to everyone for your responses!!! I have tears pouring down my face. I am going to look into a local support group, and I hope to find other moms with little ones, the same age!
Absolutely feel your stress… my 10yr old was diagnosed a few weeks ago… it’s totally drains you … although my daughter older… as a mom we still go threw these moments of non stop thinking prepping calculating worrying second guessing etc… it’s a toll…I’ve been told it gets better… in time it will and then it will be routine … I send a virtual hug… take care
@EcDrapeau Erin, and hello @Dayona Dani, so glad to hear back form you. You may have a JDRF location near you, and that is a great place to meet other parents during JDRF fundraisers. Please consider clicking the JDRF link: https://www.jdrf.org/chapter-select/ and put in your zip code. good luck we are rooting for you.
As a type 1 mommy I too feel burnt out at times my little one is only 2 diagnosed at 9 months old. She is a little tough one and handles all the pokes well but every now an then she’ll whimper or say no medicine and it completely breaks my heart I feel so bad for her. This disease is a hard one to deal with but I believe will be stronger because are babies will keep us strong their some of the toughest kids I know. keep your head up.
Erin… welcome to the group! I am so sorry to hear your baby’s diagnosis and for what you’re going through. My son was diagnosed about three weeks ago… and even though he is 14, it’s still difficult. As moms, it’s our job to protect our babies and I don’t know about you- but this made me feel like I failed him even though I know it wasn’t something I did or didn’t do that caused this. I wish I could give you a hug and let you know you are stronger than you think and your child is stronger than you know. I am so glad to have found this forum, because I was feeling completely alone. If you ever need anything please message me! I am still dealing with this adjustment, myself. Do you have family or friends that live close? Reach out anytime!! Mchll0504@gmail.com
Hey Erin, you are not alone! I am a father who on many nights sits by myself and wonder why her, why us. I am supposed to be there for my daughter and protect her from everything and i couldn’t this time when she needed me the most. All we can do is be there for our children and support them from here on.
I just wanted to tell you your not alone, my son is 6 just diagnosed about 3 weeks ago after a terrifying 911 call 3 days in PICU and then 3 more in the regular peds unit. I’m mostly alone in this my husband works I’m a stay at home mom, my adult son still lives home and does my 3 am checks which I appreciate tremendously tho. At first he kept running high, but since they added a morning long acting insulin shot and school started I’ve experienced the first lows and I know that 15 minutes after a fast acting carbs feels like forever. I call my son down because I feel panicked, wanting to call 911 but trying to b calm and wait because he’s still conscious and with it just pale sweaty and super tired. I’ve cried a lot, we took him to the fair and knowing he can never just go do things again just as a regular kid breaks my heart. He had a low day at school today another heart ache, and fear and anxiety. I’ve made mistakes and those eat me up too, one morning he didn’t drink his milk and I forgot to subtract the carbs I felt terrible, once after I primed his shot I forgot to dial again to his dose cause it was also 2ml and stuck him before realizing had to poke him again. Sometimes he says he hates me I could go on and on, I guess I not onlybwanted u to know your not alone but had some things to get out myself. It’s hard feeling isolated and alone sometimes, taking care of him has become my life which is OK, just not easy.
Hi Jean @Caesarjager and Welcome to the JDRF TypeOneNation Forum! I hope you find some comfort her and learn a few good tips about caring for your son and his diabetes. It takes time to feel comfortable and the first several month are the most trying.
You will learn how to balance food, activity and insulin - a not easy task and your son will thrive and be able to do whatever he wants, achieve and live a full active and full life. There isn’t any reason his diabetes will hold him back; I’m now in my seventh decade living with diabetes from back in the dark-ages when getting the results of a ‘blood-sugar test’ took two days, doing well and I’ve done everything a boy and a man could ever dream of doing - well everything legal and morally proper.
Don’t beat yourself up about miscounting carbohydrates and giving an inaccurate dose of insulin - I still do that, but just try again the next meal or day. Based on my experience, when in question about how much insulin is NEEDED for a meal, take the smaller amount - it is much safer to be a high after a meal than be too low. And yes, waiting the 15 minutes to see if his BG will start to go up feels like hours - and I cant count the hundreds of times I ate too much trying to correct low BG reading.
I could go on for hours writing this response, but I’ll end now and wait for your next thought or question. Visit here often with your thoughts and questions - and rant or vent your frustration too. We will listen and NOT find fault - but rather offer support.
Don’t beat yourself